Some advice for the readers out there…

  • I can easily refute an argument that is formed in the comments, however, I was taught years ago not to get into a pissing contest with a fool; therefore, I don’t believe in getting into debates in a comments section so don’t even attempt it.

 

  • If you attempt to poke that bear and continue to leave comments that are trying to foster a debate or create posts on your blog to try and lure me into your pathetic ignorance, I’ll delete your comments and block your sorry ass from commenting on my blog.  — My advice, don’t poke the bear.

 

  • Just because you have a degree in a certain field doesn’t mean you’re a genius in that field, nor does it mean that you have any wisdom what-so-ever in that field of study. 

Believe me, I know A LOT of people who have doctorates or master’s degrees in a specific field…they’ve spent years working in those fields…but they never learned anything.  It’s all huff and fluff with not a shred of substance . . .in layman’s terms: “surface knowledge”. . . and it’s quite pathetic when they attempt to declare their so-called “wisdom” because it turns out to be ignorance and nonsense.  So, please take my advice… just shut your pie hole and walk away.  Don’t talk.  Don’t type.  Just walk away.    

 

  • Don’t try to assume or presume that you know me or who I am as an individual.  Reading my blog might give you a .0000000001% of knowing anything about me, but it doesn’t mean you know me so take my advice and don’t presume or assume anything about me just because you read one of my posts. 

 

  • I find it pathetic when people fail to recognize that they aren’t as humble as they like to imagine themselves to be.  Truth is, if you think your opinion matters and you feel like you just have to tell someone how wrong they are, you’re not humble.  You’re arrogant.  My advice…keep your mouth shut and fingers off the keyboard.  It’s better not to say anything and appear to have humility than to create more problems with your pathetic words.   

 

  • If you don’t like my advice…I don’t care, it’s my blog…not yours…and it’s pathetic to think otherwise.  (also, if you think my blog is here for you to voice your opinions…you’re wrong.)  

 

  • Pathetic is as pathetic does and I enjoy writing about pathetic.  If you don’t like that subject or think it’s divisive, my advice is simple…don’t read my blog.

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I’m Forming a New Anti-Hate Group…

 

I’ve decided to start a new group that will be focused on eliminating hate forever.  I call it, “Haters Against Hating Against Haters Against Hating Abominations” 

For short, we’ll just refer to it as:  HAHAHAHA.

Lab Rat

My manager and I were discussing the reasons as to why so many pathetically ignorant people are promoted into management positions in my little vortex of hell, and then we realized that they never seem to leave.  

We actually named off close to 30 managers in my little vortex of hell who should be demoted or fired for ignorance and stupidity alone.  

Ya…that’s right . . . THIRTY! . . . and quite pathetically we probably could have named off more if we hadn’t been so rudely interrupted by a phone call from one of the managers we had previously named.

These so-called “managers” are very much like a nagging cough or stuffy nose that keeps you awake at night . . . Actually . . .that gives the annoying cough or stuffy nose a bad rap.  

I swear my little vortex of hell is cloning or breeding these people in a some secret lab, bringing them into our facility and placing them in management or supervisory roles and then secretly watching how the rest of us react to their stupidity and lack of knowledge.  

It’s like we’re lab rats or something.  

Anyhoo…

Yesterday I had this conversation with one of the aforementioned nagging coughs…

++++++++++++

Computer Manager: “Sooo, what did you find out about my computer order?  Will it be delivered tomorrow?”   

Me:  “I did find out that the order is still in production and hasn’t left the facility yet.  So no, it won’t be delivered tomorrow.” 

Computer Manager:  “Soooo…I’m not going to get it tomorrow?”

Me:  “No, but it looks like it might ship over the weekend and we might see it on Monday or Tuesday of next week.” 

Computer Manager:  “But that won’t work.  I need it delivered tomorrow.” 

Me:  “I don’t have any control over the vendor or the delivery company.  All I know is that it won’t be here tomorrow.” 

Computer Manager:  “Would you please look again?  I need that shipment tomorrow.”  

Me:  “Sure, I’ll check again, but I’m confident that we’re not getting the delivery tomorrow.” 

Me: (after checking status again)…“It’s still in the production stage, so no change.  We’re not getting that shipment tomorrow.”  

Computer Manager: (in slightly agitated and bewildered tone) “Are you serious?!?!  (sighs heavily) I cannot believe that they haven’t shipped my order yet!!  What’s the hold up on their end?”  

Me:  “Again…I don’t know.  I don’t work for the vendor, but let me contact the sales rep and see if they can shed some light on this.”

Computer Manager:  “Okay.  You do that.  And tell them I NEED that order delivered tomorrow.”  

Me:  ” yeeahh…I’ll see what I can find out.”

– 

— — time passes as I’m waiting for an answer from the vendor — — 

— — Answer finally comes from the vendor — —

Me:  “The vendor sent me an email to let me know that the order is still in production and won’t be delivered tomorrow.”  

Computer Manager:  “Seriously!!??!!  I can’t have that!!  Did you tell them I MUST have it delivered tomorrow?”  

Me:  “Yes.  But seeing as the entire order is STILL in production, it can’t be delivered tomorrow.”  

Computer Manager:  “That’s no good.  Give me his number.  I’ll call him myself.”  

Me:  “okay…here’s his number:  ###-###-####”  

— — time passes while I do other stuff that actually matters instead of waiting for her to contact me again — —

— — unfortunately, she contacts me again — —

Computer Manager:  “Okay…the sales rep told me that the order is still in production so it won’t be delivered tomorrow.”  

Me:  “yep.”  (color me surprised)

Computer Manager:  “what does the status “in production” even mean?  Does that mean it’s on the truck?”  

Me: (completely shocked (even though I shouldn’t have been) that question was even asked)  “Uuuhhhh…..no.”  

Computer Manager:  “Well, I need a tracking number so I know where it is, so if it’s not on a truck how do I know what the status is?”

Me:  “The vendor will provide the tracking number once the order ships, but since it’s still “IN PRODUCTION” and has NOT shipped yet, there won’t be a tracking number.”

Computer Manager:  “The vendor needs to be more specific about the status of my orders.  I can’t tell if it’s being shipped, in production or where it is.  This is so frustrating!” 

Me:  “Yes it is.”  (but I’m talking about her, not the vendor…fortunately for me, she’s too wrapped up in herself to recognize that)

Computer Manager:  “Well, stay on top of this and let me know the status once you have a tracking number.”  

Me:  “okay”

++++++++++++++

Folks, I couldn’t make this stuff up even if I tried, but this is the stupid and pathetic I have to deal with on a daily basis and it’s frustrating. 

Having to be a lab rat in my little vortex of hell is pathetically exhausting.    

 

Standing my ground…Dealing with inept co-workers

I work on a team of three people.  We had four, but one quit late last year because he was tired of people not doing their work.  

Well…let me rephrase that…

He quit because after almost ten full years with the company he grew tired of having to bail out ONE specific person who refused to complete their assigned work.  

Here’s the poop, each of us has specific responsibilities that we’re assigned to.  Responsibilities that aren’t very difficult.  Assigned by our supervisor.  That should be completed in a specific amount of time. 

Matter of fact…this is probably the easiest job I’ve ever had.  Unfortunately, for a specific someone on my team…they tend to make it more difficult, and for some strange reason that person can’t seem to understand the concept of getting the work done on time. . . or at all.   

For example, when a new request comes in that is assigned to him, he lets it sit in his queue for months.

There have been times where he will let work sit in his queue for up to a year or longer.  

Never acknowledging the request was assigned to him.  

Never updating the request with a status of where he’s at in the process of completing the work.  

Never contacting the person who made the request to let them know if there’s a delay or a problem or when the task will be completed.

Oh, one might think that he’s probably burned out and doesn’t want to do this specific job anymore, but if that were the case, he’d do more to make that evident . . .

which he doesn’t . . .

So I don’t believe that being burned out is the problem.

Two years ago when I first started this job, I began hearing from a lot of people about how bad this co-worker of mine has been over the years.  People were sharing their stories of failed orders, lack of accountability, communication, laziness, slacking and just down right unacceptable behavior.

I asked why they haven’t complained about him, but I always received the same reply…“we have!!  but no one takes our complaints seriously!  He’s been like this for over ten years!!”

Many of you reading this might be asking yourself if management knows about this person’s ineptitude?  

Incredibly, yes they do.  

Management has tried to move him to another team or even fire him; but since the human resources team here at my little pathetic basket of hell is afraid to do their jobs, he remains employed.

And of course, he always has an excuse for delaying the work or never completing the work.  

His reasons are endless, but after only a couple years of being his co-worker I’ve managed to figure out the two main causes of why he’s so inept:

  1. He spends practically 6 hours a day on Facebook and other social-networking sites.  
  2. Years ago he was trained by a lazy, old man who constantly repeated the phrase: “don’t get it done too quickly, or they’ll always expect it.” 

Neither of these are conducive for providing proper customer service or getting your work done in a decent duration of time.

That brings us to the here and now.

After a nice, long weekend I came in to work, opened my email and found an email from upper management who requested a status on something that was submitted over a month ago. A simple request to purchase something that would take maybe a couple hours to complete.  Sadly, after a month of waiting the purchase has not been made and the staff who requested it has not been able to do their job. 

Interestingly the email was addressed to our entire team and not just to the inept co-worker who won’t do his job and since the email was sent to our team, I could easily take care of the situation and complete the work . . .

But what does my co-worker learn if I do that?  

Answer: he learns that his slacking off doesn’t have consequences and someone else will always bail him out when the pressure mounts.

Therefore, I’m not doing his work.   

If he plans on being lazy, if he refuses to complete the work assigned to him in a decent manner of time; then he also needs to suffer the consequences.  He needs to learn that his ineptitude won’t be accepted by his co-workers.

And that’s exactly what I said when I confronted my supervisor about the issue this morning.  

I refuse to bail him out.  

It’s not going to happen this time.  It’s not going to happen in the future.  He must take responsibility for his actions, or in this case, his lack of actions.

I’m tired of working with inept co-workers.  

This workplace is really pathetic.  

 

Dunderheads

A conversation took place yesterday in an office across from my desk where one of the participants stated:  

“I’m going to have to take a week’s vacation so I can cool down enough not to come across the table at those who are making the decisions in this place.”

Okay….

it wasn’t that funny…

But I found it comical considering that our office is currently filled with dunderheads in management who couldn’t manage their way out of a corn maze cut in a straight line.

One such management decision was to consolidate all the information technology teams into one big team that would eventually save money; however, no one thought about putting together a cost allocation of how much money would actually be spent or saved if the consolidation went forward.

Now, just to be clear for those of you not in the know, cost allocation is the process of identifying, aggregating, and assigning costs to cost objects.  A cost object is any activity or item for which you want to separately measure costs.  Examples of cost objects are a product, a research project, a customer, a sales region, and a department.

Based on that definition of cost allocation, the upper dunderheads of our company should have assigned a cost to the people, the equipment and the man hours it would take for human resources to reassign locations, roles and job titles for each and every employee.  

Also included in that cost allocation should have been a set time frame for how many days, weeks, months or years it would take for all the listed resources to be moved and consolidated; along with a dollar amount associated per work hour to train the employees and to update, rename and/or reassign the equipment that is being transferred between agencies or divisions.

But, to my knowledge, none of that was ever completed.  Instead, the dunderheads that be, made the decision to move forward with the consolidation and then had the nerve to tell people that they were saving money.

Quizzically, the most prestigious dunderhead has even tried to paint a pretty picture for the general public by stating to the press that this consolidation is going to save five million dollars over the next five years.  

Thaaaaaat seems like a large dollar figure, but in light of the fact that our single agency alone spends over five million in less than three months, five million dollars in five years is like standing in front of a thousand acre corn field, grabbing an ear off a stalk, raising it above your head and declaring you saved one ear and thus ended hunger for all mankind.

. . . again . . . maaaybe not as funny as I thought…

Okay…so there have been other decisions as well that many of the dunderheads have made which contribute to the scratching of heads around here, such as…

  • Changing the title of a team without telling the specific team members the title changed.  
  • Changing accounting numbers for billing purposes, but not telling those who use the accounting numbers that they changed.
  • Putting a hold on all travel and training, but then finding out in the monthly corporate letter that the upper dunderheads traveled to training seminars in July, August, September, October, November and December.  — Ooo…and they posted pictures for all of us little people to see.  
  • Being told in a mass email that there is a hold on all non-essential purchases, and then receiving a request (I work in purchasing) to buy a television for one of the upper dunderheads because they personally don’t want to use a conference room.  

And those are just off the top of my head.

The decisions that have been made in the past year along with the actions of the upper dunderheads have caused me to question whether they have any idea how pathetic they are viewed by the rest of us who work here.  

It’s disappointing that no one has the courage to stand up to these people and to hold them accountable.

Maybe my co-worker who needs a vacation will muster the courage to stand up to them? 

Yeah…no.

It’s pathetic that I don’t see that happening.

 

 

Obsessed With Sex-u-al-i-tee

Udders

What is wrong with you sick people that you feel the need to know so many details about every person’s life?  Especially the whole issue of a person’s sexual preference?

I’ll tell you why…

Because YOU are obsessed with sex!

Oh. . .and on the topic of sexual preference. . . if a person is born with a certain sexual preference, why the hell can’t you tell just by looking at them?  Shouldn’t you know without having to ask???  Why exactly do you even question it?  

Oh, wait!  That’s right!  It’s similar to all of you who were born a dumbass.  

No one can tell you’re a dumbass just by looking at you, instead people have to ask you if you’re a dumbass.  

Typically, you all try to cover it up, but eventually the truth is revealed as soon as you open your mouth.  

Soooo, going back to my initial question…why is it so important for you to know which way someone swings their ding-a-ling?  

Does knowing that someone is a pervert make you feel more human?  Does it make you feel more adequate that you’re not the only pervert in town?  

With the way society has become so sexually obsessed I’m not surprised that companies don’t require sexual preference on a résumé. 

Work History…

Skills…

Education…

Sexual Preference!  — Ah!!  The perfect candidate!

You cattle need to get over the sexual obsession already.  After all, it’s just a means of creating humans. 

But leave it to humans to make it into something perverted, addictive and disgusting! 

Bravo humanity.  

Brav-o!  (insert slow, pathetic golf clap here)

Disappointed4

Pathetic cattle disgust me.

prideful idiots

The following is my interpretation of the conversation my pathetic co-workers are currently having….

I’m so smart.  If it weren’t for me, the world would cease to exist.

No..no..no…I’m so much smarter than you or anyone else.

NO!  I’m smarter.

Hahaha…well, I have such a high opinion of myself that everyone needs to know it, so let me tell you just how great I am.

Your skills are good, but MY skills and traits are far greater than anyone on this earth can ever obtain.  I’m so special.

Well, I’m perfect.

Look at me!

I said…

Look at me!!

. . . . . . ???

I SAID….

LOOK AT ME!!!!

I’m the best, the smartest and the most knowledgeable about everything.

No one knows more than I do.

I know what’s best for everyone, not because I have experience, but because I’m just so damn smart so let me spout off how smart I am by telling you what I think I know about nothing in particular.

Hahaha…that was SOOOOOO smart, but you know…I know more because my mommy told me I was so knowledgeable and smart…and everyone knows that my mommy is never wrong.  Hell, she even left my daddy because he couldn’t understand how smart she was and his lack of knowledge was unbearable to her.

What an idiot daddy was.

Mommy is so smart.

I love mommy.

Mommy packed my lunch today.  I think I got a surprise.

Maybe it’s pudding!

wouldn’t that be great!?

mmmmm….

I like pudding.

hey! why did you walk away?   . . . . . ???

Where are you going?

….???…..

What?

What do you mean I’m annoying?  . . .

huh?

….