In other news…
Being unable to work out an agreement with the Iranian government over their nuclear capabilities Secretary of State, John Kerry, decided to call in what he refers to as, “the big guns.”
From what reliable sources have told us, it appears that the Secretary of State made a call to an unnamed military official to implement a top-secret government project only known as: “Founding Fathers“.
Unknown to our sources, it appears this top-secret government project has been in the works since the late 1940’s at a secret military location known as Area 51.
Sources tell me that this project will give the United States government access to some of the best critical thinkers in all of U.S. history, but its main purpose is to be used as a means of bringing the past into the present. In layman’s terms: it’s a form of time travel.
If you think that sounds ridiculous, you’re not alone.
This reporter also thought the very same thing, until this recent picture was snapped at a summit meeting between the U.S. and Iranian governments, which clearly shows a very stunned Secretary of State seated next to, what appears to be, a very real Benjamin Franklin.
When Mr. Kerry was asked about whether or not “the big guns” were in fact some of the original founding fathers of the United States of America, Mr. Kerry only stated that he had no comment at this time but would be willing to talk more about the U.S. Iranian nuclear deliberations. The ultimate goal of those deliberations involving Iran and the U.S., Britain, China, France, Germany and Russia is a deal that would crimp Tehran’s capacity to make nuclear weapons in exchange for sanctions relief.
However, speaking on condition of anonymity, a high-level representative from France known only to our sources as “Ada” said that since a deal could not be reached by the proposed deadline, a former United States diplomat was brought in to “ease some tensions and bring a new perspective on matters.”
Both sides recognize that there is leeway to extend to July 9.
As part of an agreement with the U.S. Congress, lawmakers then have 30 days to review the deal before suspending congressional sanctions.