Winter, The Pathetic Season

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I hate snow.  I hate freeze your face off, dry your skin, bitter stinkin’ cold. 

I hate all things that deal with winter. 

I see no reason for this season.  Therefore, I have dubbed it a pathetic season.

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Everything in nature basically dies in winter.  The grass dies, trees die, bugs die, animals die…so what’s the point of having a season of death? 

Freezing temps come in winter with dry air that causes wrinkles and there is no amount of lotion that can cure the dry skin that ails us all.  And shaving…ever try to shave your face when your skin is dry?   No?   Well, let me tell ya…it’s like rubbing sandpaper on your skin for ten minutes and then pouring hydrogen peroxide on the wound. 

And with the cold comes the opportunity to bake and cook and make meals that we don’t normally make in the warmer months, therefore, weight gain happens. 

Sure, you can attempt to eat healthy but it’s futility because the longer you’re indoors, the more you crave something hearty and delicious.  The more you crave hearty and delicious, the more you desire to watch the cooking channel.  The more you watch the cooking channel, the more ideas you get for cooking something hearty and delicious.  The more ideas you get to cook something hearty and delicious, the more you crave something hearty and delicious.  It’s a vicious, pathetic cycle. 

And with the weight gain comes the uncomfortable situation of wearing clothes that don’t fit.  And with that comes the thought that you’ve gained so much weight that you’re unhappy with how you look and feel.  So you feel it necessary to wear baggy clothes to cover up and hide your excess weight gain.  You can wear a lot of layers in winter, but who wants to do that?  That’s restricting and stifling.  Which is even more uncomfortable. 

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Then the snow flies and we have to shovel it.  Ice comes and no one can walk or drive safely in it. 

The other day we had some snow falling and the roads became slick.  As I was driving along, I watched a person in a brand new four-wheel drive vehicle weave in and out of traffic like the streets were dry and clear. 

As they approached the intersection, the light turned red and they were far enough away to come to a stop, but since the road conditions were so slick they slid through the intersection.  How they didn’t cause a wreck is only by the grace of almighty God.  Four-wheel drive is great in the deep stuff, but not on icy roads.   

So here’s a new slogan for the winter season…

“Winter.  The season of death.  It’s clearly pathetic.”

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Agree? don’t agree?   There’s a section below where you can moo all you want.   

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